Day...7? yeah I think so

So here is the portrait of Emma Stone I didn't finish yesterday and today's studies. I haven't done perspective in awhile so I just kind of did a little bit of a refresher to try and get myself back into it and added shading for funsies. Next week I'll start learning about 3 point perspective and how ridiculously hard it is. Finally, I did a landscape and took some notes which I've never done for landscapes and although they're fairly simple I did learn from them.

So today I woke up late. It doesn't sound that bad but in my mind it is. I have a schedule now, I need to be more serious about it and be more serious about getting what needs to be done done. I won't be able to dilly dally at all in the future when I'm moved out and working as an artist as a professional career. I'll need to be serious if I want to sustain a constant income and still improve my art at a rate I'm satisfied with. So again, I woke up late and didn't get to start working on art until around 3 in the afternoon, maybe even past that. I finally finished my last study (landscape), after much distraction and much goofing around, it was around 12:00-12:30.

I find this unacceptable in myself, I never want it to happen again because I feel like if I can't even do the 2 simple studies for today and get a little client work done then how am I going to be in the future? It's not like I went anywhere today either, I mostly stayed at home but I did go on a walk which took an hour out of my time but was nice and went to pick up pizza for my family. However, that was it, all the other time spent not drawing was eating and playing a little bit of Sonic on our Wii. I'm not sure why I'm even ranting about this but it sucks y'know? As artists, a lot of the time you feel guilty when you aren't drawing. And then other stuff happens that you need to stop drawing to do and then you get grumpy and then someone gets upset at you for being grumpy and you feel guilty for feeling grumpy because you're feeling guilty that you aren't drawing! It's a terrible vicious cycle that I have to deal with right now and I feel like the only one to blame is myself for not managing my time better and not organizing what's more important in my life.

Drawing is what keeps me sane, it's what makes my life bearable when I'm feeling down and what makes a good day even greater. To be able to sit and just think to myself and let the tablet pen fly and do whatever I want it to do. I love it, I've always loved it, and I will continue to love it until the day I die. Therefore, I need to start making it a bit more higher priority in certain cases and most of all I have to get my shit together.